I think we’re doing okay?
I really can’t tell you for certain that we’re okay or we’ll be okay. I feel like I just can’t know that. I continue to tell everyone that we’re doing better and we’re “getting there”. Every time those words escape my mouth I cringe a little. I’m trusting that we will be okay and that Meg and I will have a happy life but it’s a daily effort that I don’t always win.
We’re often struck with the reality that those closest too us don’t know what we’re going through. I struggle with this as I don’t think anyone can exactly know what you’re going through. I know that they are feeling an entirely different pain and grief for Sullivan. I don’t want anyone to know this pain. Just as I don’t ever want to know what it’s like to lose a close friend or parent. I do however want to know what it’s like to be content with this life.
We’re getting there.